Albert Rodney & Victoria Jeanette
Friday, November 07, 2003
Talked to Jill at Phoebe:
Dad was in physical therapy. He is more cooperative lately. Says we need to bring more clothes since he is getting out of bed more. His pain is being controlled and he is on oxygen.
Talked to Thomas Renaldo, DO (Phoebe Medical Director and Dad's attending):
Discussed Dad's "directives" and we agree on: no CPR, no move to hospital, no mechanical respiration, no feeding tube. We will be notified if they need to give him IV hydration etc. We can decide at the time. They are basically treating him as hospice patient. He will call to notify Jill so we are all on the same page.
Lin's Pre-Surgery Testing:
Stayed with Lin during her bone scan, x-ray, ekg and other testing today -- 7:30 AM to 4:30 PM. Surgery schedule for next Thursday.
Thursday, November 06, 2003
Talked to Cousin Rick Moraux
Forgot to mention I called Marcy and Rick on Tuesday to tell them about their Uncle Rod. Marcy is still very depressed, is seeing a shrink and is on heavy antidepressants. Didn't stay on the phone long.
I had a long talk with Rick -- I couldn't get him off the phone once he started relating his experience with Aunt Betty and her pancreatic ca. They both took care of her for 2-3 weeks around the clock until she died. Marcy took a leave from work and stayed during the day. He slept there over night. Hospice came during the day to help with meds etc. Betty never had surgery. Died of jaundice and malnutrition but was mentally alert until the end. Rick reminded me that she had cancer in one eye, which had been removed.
He called back tonight. Rick is going to be in Allentown at the Fair Grounds on Saturday and says he may stop in to see Dad, though he doesn't know exactly when.
FINANCIAL / LEGAL
$38K of Dad's Evergreen securities were sold and now appear in his sweep account. Called Mark Schaaf (Wachovia) to have $35K moved to Mom's cash account -- instead of writing checks.
I will deposit two $7K checks tomorrow to balance the gift of the Buick to VL and Jim.
Coincidentally, Wachovia was questioning their own policies on allowing us to use POA with a trust account! Someone in Mark's office thought that the successor trustees were the ones (still VL and me) who could have access. Of course, they need to dig up their own copy of the trust paperwork.
Who is right? Lawyer Noonan says that 'successor trustee' doesn't come into play until Dad dies.
Wednesday, November 05, 2003
Called Dad Today
I tried calling last night but he was eating and we cut it short.
Today, he still needed help with the phone. Very hard to communicate. He claims that he was out of bed and walking and that is was taking his meds. I told him VL and I would visit on Saturday.
Heard him say "I love you" in response to mine.
FINANCIAL/LEGAL
Just got call from Linda Noonan, Esq. She called back to verify that both VL and I are 'successor trustees' of both Mom and Dad's bypass trusts.
When Dad dies, his trust stays put -- but it is "for the benefit" of Mom. We will no longer have POA but must register 'Letters' with the court to notify them of our trustee role. Letters are then sent to financial institutions (Wachovia & Vanguard) so we can legally sign his checks etc as trustees.
I need to find out if the 'cash sweep' accounts at Wachovia are a part of the trust or not. Noonan said that Social Security checks should not be deposited into trust accounts -- just accounts that are in the individual's name. I will call Mark Schaaf at Wachovia.
Tuesday, November 04, 2003
ELECTION DAY / SARA OFF
I stayed home Tuesday. Nice to sleep late -- 9AM. Lin had to work until noon.
Payed some of Dad's bills. Tried to cancel the cell phone but he has a contract until Dec 2004. We could pay the $175 penalty, though.
Sara and I managed to ride bikes to the park. We both wish we had more time like this together. We planned a play date with Alex(andra) while Lin and I were at the doctor's appointment.
Lin and I met with Dr. Rose. He validated a lot of what we already knew but he has less experience than Dr. Hayward. We'll stick with our plans.
Vicki emailed...
Called the nurse tonight and they finally got him to take the
Roxanol. No other reports.
vl
-----Original Message-----
From: Rod Murray [mailto:murray@netmcs.com]
Sent: Monday, November 03, 2003 10:01 PM
To: vicki@animalbrands.com
Subject: Re: Dad, Today - Monday, November 3
Roxanol is just another brand of timed-release morphine sulfate, like MS
Contin.
Monday, November 03, 2003
Vicki emailed...
The nurse on duty said that his record for today is
that he refused his daily meds and the ?roxanol?
morphine.
Suggested he be called Rod and Rodney rather
than Albert to see if he responds better.
She didn't know if they tried to disguise the meds
in a drink.
That's all she could offer.
Called Dad next. He spoke with me. He was a
bit disoriented, but said he was glad to see Mom
when I told him we were all there. He didn't react
to the fact that we all came, though. Told him
I'd call back this pm. He said he feels slight pain
so I told him to ask for medicine. Very weak voice,
at times unintelligible.
vl
Vicki emailed...
Spoke with the nurses and dad had a restful night.
I forget the girl's name, but she said that he shifts
from being passive to restless. The pain killer
relaxes breathing. Otherwise no changes in
behavior thru the night according to records.
vl
I'll tell you what mom said when we talk. She's
pretty tuned into what's happening. Also, call
when you have time to hear what Jim concluded after
talking with funeral home.
Sunday, November 02, 2003
Family Visits Dad in Phoebe Home
I arrived at about 11:30AM. Dad was a bit agitated and could not speak very loudly. He told me I "looked good". The nurse said he refused his meds. He was in pain. I got him to agree to take the morphine -- fed to him in applesauce.
Vicki arrived. Very hard to speak to him. He stared off, had a pained expression and seemed emotional at times but he was very dry (from the diuretic). We helped him drink water thru a straw. He was so weak. Very emotional for us.
Played Sara's compositions. Dad seemed to like them but asked me to "slow it down". I thought he meant make it quieter -- but no. I explained that's how Sara performed it.
Jim and family were on the way. The nurse arrived with Dad's lunch, so Vicki and I drove out to a local diner for lunch.
Jim, Peter, Andrew and Jesse arrived at around 2:30 PM with Mom. Mom looked fine -- Jesse had helped her dress.
It was so very touching. Mom and Dad kissed a dozen times. Mom was very sweet but no tears. Played Sara's songs again. I felt like crying the whole day.
I called Lin and Sara who both took turns speaking to him on the phone. Lin's loving comments caused him to break a smile. He understands but couldn't speak but unintelligible whispers.
Jim and company left and I helped Vicki take Mom down to the car. Dad wouldn't let go. He couldn't speak and had such a forlorn look on his face -- I will never forget how he looked.
Original Recordings by Sara for Dad
Early Sunday morning I woke up Sara and asked her to play her wonderful compositions. I had finally figured out how to record on audio tape (ancient tech). Two old cassette recorders I had didn't work. Finally, I attached 2 mics from our Karaoke player to the tape player/recorder on our HiFi setup. I still didn't have a working portable playback device.
Let for Allentown around 10AM and stopped at a Radio Shack in Trexlertown. Luckily it opened at 11AM and I bought a small portable tape player.
Vicki emailed...
Just spoke with Jill at Dad's nurse station.
She said he is calm, comfortable, not
agitated like yesterday morning. Not really
talking, just nodding yes that he's comfortable.
He's been told that we're all coming today.
We've got to get Mom there today.
I may go to church just to sing and then head to
Phoebe. Jim can bring the kids. I'll keep in
touch.
